No one likes unsolicited advice so, in stead of that, let me just pass along three comments - two short and one long.
1. When mom ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy.
2. Priesthood holders have a responsibility to lead their families. Wise priesthood holders usually lead their families in the direction their wives want to go.
3. Fast and pray about it. Then do what the Lord inspires you to do, even if it is not what either of you have in mind.
When Joseph Smith went into the woods to pray vocally, he probably had no idea that none of the churches were true. Also, it was not his intent to simply ask a curious question just for the sake of knowing. He fully intended to find out which church was true and then act upon that information. He intended to join the true church and follow its teachings, but was lead in a different direction.
In 1973, eight or nine months after Theresa was born, I got out of the Air Force and mom and I went looking for a place to live. I had predetermined that I wanted to live in the Great Northwest and, since mom knew almost nothing about the US, I didn’t consult her much about the decision. It turned out that we (I) liked Spokane the best of all the places we looked at. Upon graduating from the Univ. of Michigan the following spring. I looked for jobs in Washington and Oregon, particularly Spokane, but couldn’t find any. I finally got job offers in Portland, Seattle, and Chicago. Why would I want to live in Chicago? I wouldn’t, even though the job paid 2.4 times more than the Seattle job, almost twice as much as the Portland job, and I would be sent to an overseas branch, which I wanted. I prayed about it - whether to go to Portland or Seattle. A clear answer came - none of the above. It was the only time I have ever received an unmistakable stupor of thought in answer to a prayer. So, we moved to Chicago for six months, then to Hong Kong for three months, then to Australia for three years. It worked out very well for us, although Cindy still complains that we came back to the US four months too early.
Being somewhat stubborn and more naive than I thought, when we got back to the US I packed the family into our car and moved to Spokane. Grandma and Grandpa lived in Scottsdale, AZ at the time and wanted us to live there. They even wanted to help us buy a nice house. This time, however, I didn’t risk praying about it. We simply move to Spokane and lived there for seven years. I really liked it there. However, I never did find a decent job and, financially, it was a bust. After Mark was born the handwriting was on the wall. We were going to have to move to a bigger city where I could get a decent job. (Large corporations were the only employers who hired MBA’s at that time.) I spent six or eight months looking for jobs in Seattle, then Portland, with no luck. Finally, I lowered my standards and also looked in San Francisco. Still nothing. Salt Lake City was about the same size as Spokane then (and I didn’t want to live there) so that left only Phoenix and Los Angeles as large western cities where I might find work. I had lived near Gilbert, AZ (Williams AFB) for a year so I knew I didn’t want to live there and L.A. was the last place (well, almost the last place) on earth that I wanted to live. I didn’t even want to visit there! Smog, traffic, heat, and weirdoes. No way. Should we move back to Chicago or to New York? Ugh! Now, I was fasting and praying a lot about where to live.
Well, I got several good job offers in L.A. and you know the rest of the story. Even though I would still much rather live in Spokane, I must admit that living in Fullerton has worked out very well for us - except perhaps for Philip and my refusal to acknowledge myself as a Californian.
“So what?” as Pres. Faust used to say. Well, the point of the story is that Heavenly Father will help you out and take you where you should go if you will let Him. (I have often wondered why I went to pilot training at Williams Field. Out of nine pilot training bases at the time, it was almost everyone’s first choice and, by far, the most desirable base. It was also the only one located in a LDS community. How strange, I joined the Church while stationed there.) If you both fast and pray as Joseph Smith did - with real intent to follow His counsel, even if it is not what you wanted - you will go where He wants you to go and do what He wants you to do. The prophet Jonah prefer in stead to go his own direction and do what he want to do. We know what happened to Jonah. He went to Nineveh the longer harder way rather than the easy way. If we had moved to Fullerton seven years earlier, we would probably already have mom’s dream house rather than be looking for it now.
Well, sorry this is so long, but I hope it give you something to think about.
Love Dad
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